Liberation from not having to be somewhere, my desk, at a certain time was bliss. Having the time and space to think, to mentally escape was wonderful. My first proper pause.
Reading, writing and thinking have been the tools that have really helped me. I’d never have imagined how much I would enjoy these and now fully appreciate how they each build on and integrate with, each other. That’s bloody obvious really, but as someone who struggled throughout school and only relatively recently found out they’re mildly dyslexic, this is a big deal. These daily pages – just writing without worrying about where it may wonder, have been brilliant. I’m writing for myself and really they’re not for anyone else to read, but I think publishing them helps me get over the fear of writing too.
Reading some Stoic philosophy, such as A Guide to the Good Life, has also helped to provide me with tools to make sense of what I should and shouldn’t worry about – the trichotomy of control. This, I think, is the nucleus of my thinking. A lot of what I’ve been reading recently, and the people that have been inspiring me, appear to be rooted in Stoicism. It’s a path I will continue to follow with the hope that it will help with my newfound balance. Of cause, returning to work will test this, but I hope to stay on top of everything. Starting with the intention of protecting myself and my time so that I can be more useful to others by inspiring them to be the best they can be. I will need to say no to lots, which may appear to be less helpful, but the intent is to help more by getting out of the way. I will try to be clear with everything I say or request, always explaining ‘why’. I wish to be an inspirational leader rather than a managing leader. My wellbeing and happiness are important as they will filter down to others. Bringing my best self to work will benefit me and everyone around me.